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“Let me begin by saying that this is a continuation of a long and storied history of the spatula. My great-great-grandfather Horatio Spatula (pronounced spa-tooo-la reflecting his Greek-Sardinian heritage) immigrated to the United States in the mid-1880s. At that time people were using all sorts of common household tools to accomplish such tasks as frosting cakes, or flipping eggs. One day as he was attempting to flip his "easy-over" eggs with a broom handle, his frustration had reached the limit. "There'sa gotta' be-a' better-a' way-a'. My great-great-grandmother Josephine said that there was and she handed him a coal-skuttle. She said, "you gowanna' ahead anda use-a dis here a-ting". At first Horatio was skeptical but he tried it, and said you know-a' what, you-a' maybe-a' on-a' to someting-a' here."The coal-skuttle egg flipper worked o.k.,but he found when trying to frost a cake he would knock things off of the counter. So he took the coal-skuttle and cut it down by about half. This worked much better. Then he reduced it even more so that it started to resemble what today is known as the spatula. Being the enterprising person that he was, he brought it to Eli Walton, (yes you know who's great-grandfather this is) with an idea to market it. Well Walton took one look at it and laughed. He said, "who's going to buy something to flip eggs with or frost a cake! Ridiculous! Then my great-great-grandfather hit him with what has become known as the nuptial logic. He asked Mr. Walton, "how many people get married every year?" And wouldn't it be nice if everyone who got married, got a spatula. Again, Walton rejected his idea. Horatio approached such other notables as Thomas Edison and George Eastman, but the answer was always the same, ridiculous! they said. Not to be dismayed, my grandfather set out across the nation preaching the gospel of the spatula. As he would go from town to town across western New York he would leave a spatula as a gift. Soon word started spreading about this great new tool that could be used to, flip flapjacks and eggs. Could frost cakes, and in the most enlightened communities also acted as a marital aid, the old Aunt Jamima treatment.Well before you know it orders started flowing in. His business exploded. After a couple of generations the product line has expanded to include such things as the spatula key-chain, and the world famous spatula holster. Last year, as you know we introduced an entire "left-handed" line. What started out as a metal/wood device is now made with state of the art materials including kevlar and corian. Our future is brighter than ever with our association with DougMart. Only a Renaissance man like Doug Meisch who has the vision, as well as the joie-de-vivre to incorporate Spatula City into enterpise. We look forward to a long and prosperous future and as my great-great- grandfather said, after he learned Spanish, summed up what a kitchen without a spatula is like when he said "un dia sin donas is como un dia sin chicarones" (a day without doughnuts is like a day without pork rinds).” Biography: Edward Reese is the adopted great-great-grandson of Horatio Spatula, the inventor of the spatula.Edward attended the Universities of Sydney, Luxembourg, Harvard and Princeton. He received his undergraduate degree from Finger Lakes Community College in Fine Arts. He also has a degrees in Chiropractic technology and Scatology as well as being an ordained minister in the Church of Our Lady of Perpetual Bingo. Before becoming President of Spatula City he was a world wide promoter of a number of rock bands including Root Canal and Deviated Septum. He was also a recruiter for William and Mary College, but his career there came to an abrupt halt in the fall of 1975 when he placed all of William and Mary's football hopes in the hands of a small high school quarterback Doug Meisch, (or as he was known at the time) the next Joe Namath. But that’s another story for another time. |
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